I like to call her Clyde

Claire emerges from the hallway and flops herself down on the loveseat. She looks at me and says:
"I like your bathroom because I look at a picture of Paul Warford while I'm taking a shit"

My obsession with pinball has started to worry me. I had a dream last night that a place opened near where I live that had all kinds of pinball machines and it was a truly wonderful dream.
I have started searching kijiji for pinball machines in Atlantic Canada.

Context

Sarah: "I have a black man inside of me.
Me: "A black man inside of you???"
Sarah (Smiling): "A big, fat, hairy black man inside of me."

Rebuttal...

Heard from across the room (Presumably when Sarah read the previous post)

(In a really high pitch, squealing voice)
"Peter!!! I can't believe you wrote that!!! I didn't mean it like that"

It kinda made it funny all over again.

On voyeurism....

Me: "We had sex with the drapes open."
Sarah: "Yeah, but it was all the way in there."
Me: "But those Asian people got funny cameras"
Sarah: "They got funny eyes!"